Darting Arrows

This morning on my way to the office, the famous Cook Mrs. Paula Dean herself was interviewed on HIS Radio WRTP. She simply tickles me! Her optimism and joy for family and comfort thrill me. Although, I'm sure eating all those yummy foods would get me at some point, if you know what I mean. She was talking about how many shows she's been on recently, her new restaurant, and the joys of her family. She chuckled and said,

"You know how you can't hit a moving target? Well I just don't stop movin'!"

How true is this for most of us? We are afraid it will all catch up with us if we slow down. It ends up being a viscious cycle if you think about it: you stress if you slow down, you stress when you speed up; then eventually you simply crash.

If you are darting from the arrows of stress, where do you go?

Who do you turn to?

What are your patterns?

Some of us eat, some of us yell, some of us sleep. Either way, this whole dance of darting the arrows causes a lot of stress for you and for the people around you.

What do you think would happen if you slowed down?

What is the worst thing that could happen?

What is the best thing that could happen?

What is another viewpoint on slowing down?

Keep on diggin'! Keep on asking and answering. This way you will get a clearer picture as to the core issue.

Get that armor off, quit running in the wrong direction. Slow down!

Chronic Pain: Coping Strategies

Pain is the body’s way of sounding our internal alarm. It says, “Stop, you’re going too far, you’re doing too much, this is dangerous.” Without these warnings, you could be in serious trouble! Everyone’s pain tolerance is different- some can handle more bodily stress than others. When pain supersedes your tolerance with a daily or triggered experience due to a past injury or unidentified condition, chronic pain is usually a suspect.

In my previous blog, we identified chronic pain. UNDERSTANDING chronic pain is actually the first coping strategy with this every day battle. If you don’t know you have it, you can’t cope! Side note, I am not a doctor and this blog is not to be used to diagnose or suggest that you have chronic pain. If you have not been diagnosed with chronic pain, and suspect that this may be the case, please see your doctor. Grab some materials and resources and learn how your body is reacting to this pain. Get to know your body, your pain tolerance, what you can and can’t do. This first step of understanding is sort of like getting to know an irritating friend! Knowing your patterns, your triggers etc. will all help you live a fuller life with chronic pain. You are not isolated, you are not alone, and you are not helpless to this condition.

The second coping strategy is REST: mixed with finding peace and managing your stress and emotions. The big bad monster called stress causes muscle tension, mental tension, and a myriad of intense chemical reactions within the body. Take care of this monster, and your tension will melt away. Deep breathing, stretching however you can, and most of all- resting! Chronic pain is not an excuse to avoid action- it’s the opposite! Even on the days you can’t walk or get out of bed, work on your inner stress. Prayer, meditation, peaceful music and journaling are all great ways to getting started on the journey to inner and outer peace. Leave your worries, your pain and stress at the foot of the cross during prayer. Leave them there, don’t take them back. The more you give your pain away, the more emotional room you are creating! You’d be surprised how this positive reaction to pain will help physically and emotionally!

The third coping strategy is a mix of relational and physical activity, but more simplified: ACTION. Once you’ve rested up, supporting yourself with other’s company and encouragement is a necessity. It’s so easy to isolate yourself during spells of pain, not only can it be embarrassing and humiliating, but it can also be an easy excuse to separate yourself from the one’s you love. Be willing to keep a strong connection with someone. Every superhero needs a sidekick. Any sort of relational interaction lifts the spirits. I spend a lot of time with my dog, a boxer named Indiana Jones. Even when I’m in pain, he gets me up to walk him, play, and even get silly! The second area of this coping strategy incorporates physical activity. Please consult your doctor for specific advice on your activity level. Anything active gets your dopamine levels (the “feel good” chemicals) to raise and help ease the pain. Get out and have a good time with a friend, your pet. Get outside and enjoy nature, rejoice in something beautiful. One of my best coping strategies is LAUGHING!! Laugh; laugh some more, and laugh even more after that. Just remember that positivity can kill stress, negative thoughts, and even help with pain management.

Finally, HOPE: Never give up! There are so many new drugs, therapies, and studies going on continually regarding different aspects of chronic pain. Don’t give up hope for new therapies. Also, chronic pain can sometimes drag you down in the dirt with it. Don’t give up hope for yourself- fight depression, stress and anxiety. Teach yourself new ways of thinking and coping. Don’t waste away! This life is precious, so, so precious. Your body may be affected by pain, but do not let your life be wasted because of it. You can do it!!

Chronic Pain: A Series. Pt. 1: What is it?

Chronic pain is a wide spread problem mainly among older adults. However, over the past five years chronic pain has been statistically proven to be prevalent in younger adults. I have my own definition, but academically let’s define chronic pain. The American Academy of Pain Medicine defines chronic pain as, “Pain signals keep firing in the nervous system for weeks, months, even years. There may have been an initial mishap -- sprained back, serious infection, or there may be an ongoing cause of pain -- arthritis, cancer, ear infection, but some people suffer chronic pain in the absence of any past injury or evidence of body damage.” Yikes! This is an area inside of medicine that is not fully understood or quickly able to diagnose. Just to give you a better perspective: 76.2 million suffer from chronic pain in contrast to 11 million from cancer!

So, enough about the clinical stuff. If you are one of the 76.2 million who suffer from chronic pain, you’re probably tired of definitions, doctors, medication trial and error, and the financial strain. In fact, you’re probably sick of feeling sick! Maybe you’re tired and depressed from the strain chronic pain has put on your body.

My story with chronic pain is lengthy and would require a 10 part series by itself. So, I’ll shoot for the abbreviated version. For years I saw doctor after doctor, tried medication after medication with no return. I even started to doubt if my pain was even real. Some days, I was just fine. I could go to my college classes, be active, and even feel normal. Other days I couldn’t get out of bed, had to use the dreaded cane to walk, and missed many college classes. I don’t know how many MRI’s, Nerve Conduction Tests, X-Rays, blood tests it took for me to realize that this pain was stress related. No two doctors told me the same results, many of them telling me my pain was not related to anything physically diagnosable.

I could say that I found answers but none of them the remedy to the pain. I think the majority of what I’ve learned about chronic pain is accepting the good and bad days. Thank God for my family, my employer, and my friends for understanding this as well.

As stated earlier, chronic pain is not easily understood. Most of the time it’s triggered by an injury or an event in one’s life thus causing a mishap in the nervous system. Neuropathy, fibromyalgia, migraines, edema and fatigue are all chronic pain mysteries.

I wanted to go ahead and introduce this subject before continuing.The next part in this series of chronic pain will discuss key components coping with this every day battle.

References

American Academy of Pain Medicine. (2011). AAPM Facts and Figures on Pain. Found online March 18 2011 at http://www.painmed.org/patient/facts.html.

Falling in love with Fall...

When I was a little girl, I can remember making "leaf forts" with the leaves that our parents "let" us rake. My twin brother and I would make a skeleton out of bark, limbs, anything we could find and then stuff these colorful, crispy leaves into the structure. Believe it or not, these forts were pretty strong and actually really awesome. I can remember laying inside of one of our forts gazing up through the bright leaves into the crisp blue chilled sky. What a memory! I love fall. I love the memories it evokes.

I have had the blessed opportunity to experience the Fall Season twice. I was in upstate New York in early October where the leaves were on fire with brilliance. This week, here in good 'ole North Carolina, the trees are so beautiful and bright- they are literally distracting. I can't really drive as well as I ought because I'm focused on such beautiful, clear colors.

Someone told me the amazing chemistry behind the changing of leaves- something about the how the glucose in the leaves gets trapped when the photosynthesis stops (the signal of winter: shorter days and light). The trees "know" when to stop chemical exchange, thus leading to the changing of colors and eventually they fall off. Awesome, huh?

This season, like every other, seems so short- like it had just begun a couple days ago. Yet in a couple of weeks, these trees around me will become bare bones, exposing their skeletons to all. I could say the usual "life is short, like the seasons so enjoy it while you have it" kind of thing; I'm feeling more pulled to say simply that our earth is beautiful. Still cheesy, yet it's what I have been thinking every day when I see these colors.

The things God created, what they do, what they look like in these short seasons- are simply BEAUTIFUL.

Vegetate

Sometimes, I get home and simply vegetate. I don't watch TV, I don't get on the computer. No reading, no writing. I simply pause. What's wrong with this picture?

Nothing! After day after day of tasks and busywork, taking an hour to stop everything is OK. Is this considered laziness? Absolutely not. Laziness conjures images of

procrastination and avoidance. For us TYPE A personality folks, vegetating for a brief time period is actually recommended. This creates mental space in your brain, physical healing in your body, and a "re-balancing" effect on your perspective.

When you vegetate, try not to start creating lists- the point of pausing is to STOP thinking about tasks left undone. The point is to find this empty space (it's somewhere deep down in there). What might you find? A moment of peace? Hmm....

The perfect example: my dog Indiana Jones. He's "full steam ahead" during the day- running after squirrels, trying to climb trees, swimming in the baby pool, and generally doing his "doggy" stuff. He's a busy boy- something is always happening. But every now and again something strange happens: He goes on "Screen Saver Mode." His neck literally drops while he's standing- his eyes focused on something far away. He could stay like this for up to 5 minutes. He is pausing. Resting his neck. (this has nothing to do with him being a bird dog- although he does "point").

Some of you may have no trouble with taking 10 minutes to look into the deep space galaxy of the ceiling. Some of you may have no quarrels with veggin' out on the sofa in your living room (dubbed "The Barge"). This message is for those of us who do:

Allow yourself.

Even the Energizer Bunny takes a breather..

God's voice sounds like....

What does God's voice sound like? Is it a booming from the heaven's striking any and all who are in range? Does it sound like an echoing James Earl Jones? For each person, God's voice is different and unique. Beauty in the music; a baby smiling; standing firm against opposition; peace and tranquility. You will hear and see God's movement in a totally different way than the person sitting next to you will. Because of our unique backgrounds, passions, and gifts, His voice is our full portion. It's all we need!

"And he said, The God of our fathers has chosen you, that you should know his will, and see that Just One, and should hear the voice of his mouth."
- Acts 22:14

Some may say, we don't hear His voice- because we have the Bible. Don't forget His sheep hear their Master's voice! (John 10:16).

The following is an expert of an article about different ways we hear God's voice:

A still small voice. Elijah was on the run in 1 Kings 19 from evil Queen Jezebel who ordered his death, after a mighty miracle in which he challenged the prophets of Baal to call upon their God while Elijah called upon his. As a result, God consumed Elijah's altar with fire, and Jezebel's unanswered prophets were all put to death. Despite God's marvelous works, His mightiest prophet was frightened and had retreated into a cave.

1 Kings 19:11-13 says, "And he said, Go forth, and stand upon the mount before the LORD. And, behold, the LORD passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the LORD; [but] the LORD [was] not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; [but] the LORD [was] not in the earthquake: And after the earthquake a fire; [but] the LORD [was] not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice. And it was [so], when Elijah heard [it], that he wrapped his face in his mantle, and went out, and stood in the entering in of the cave. And, behold, [there came] a voice unto him, and said, What doest thou here, Elijah?"

A voice in your ear. Isaiah 30:21 says, "And thine ears shall hear a word behind thee, saying, This [is] the way, walk ye in it, when ye turn to the right hand, and when ye turn to the left.

Conviction by the Holy Spirit. John 16:8 says that when the Holy Spirit comes, He will convict the world of sin, righteousness and judgement. In the same fashion, let's say you were about to say something really nasty to someone. You suddenly either feel a "pulling back" by the Holy Spirit to not say that nasty thing, or you sense the Lord tap you on the skull and say, "Son, that's not nice. Don't say that." The word "to convict" is also translated as "to reprove." We must be humble and accept God's reproof of our actions!

Being led by the Spirit. Romas 8:14 says, "For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God." When you are in a constant state of loving intimacy with Jesus, and you not only allow Him to lead your life, but you are accutely sensitive to the Holy Spirit as how He desires to lead you, that places you in right relationship with the Lord, such that you are God's little son or daughter! The Holy Spirit may either allow you to sense His urging you in a particular direction, or may even speak to you audibly.

When reading the word, a scripture jumps out at you. In your Quiet Times before the Lord, have you ever found that - as you're reading from your Bible - a particular verse suddenly jumps out at you? There's an excitement, as you say, "Yes! That verse fits exactly my situation! That's my verse!" The Holy Spirit has a way of illuminating upon the Word and opening our eyes to understand its meaning much deeper than what we would understand as a result of an dry, academic theological head-knowledge study that has no application nor pertinence in your life or anyone else's nor has the power to tell a flea to go away? The more you take those scriptures the Lord reveals to you and hide it in your heart, the more God finds you trustworthy to give you more revelation!

What ways does God get your attention? It's that still small voice that is a tug on the heart! I see it in beautiful colors, His unfailing love and grace, and in the growth of those around me. His hand is always sweeping through the nations- just watch for the trees to move and you'll catch a glimpse into His kingdom!

Can you hear Him? Can you? Are you listening?

Source: Unknown. (Unknown). Hearing God's voice. Retrieved February 18, 2010 from http://www.tamil-bible.com/god_vce.html.

For All Those 20 Somethings!!

I realized a few years ago that this term called "Quarter-Life Crisis" is entirely real. I was flipping through some research and found the below piece (author unknown). It pretty much declares a lot of those underlying feelings and issues that a lot of twenty-somethings' begin to identify with. I personally was hit with this term and it's baggage when I turned twenty one. So many students are graduating early, wising up younger, and searching for a solid faith. This term will continue to develop and become as big as the "Mid-Life Crisis" (without the red sports car craving). I'd love to hear your feedback!


The Quarter-Life Crisis
by unknown

"It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn't know and may or may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you do not realize is that they are realizing that too and are not really cold or catty or mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job. It is not even close to what you thought you would be doing or maybe you are looking for one and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and are scared.

You miss the comforts of college, of groups, of socializing with the same people on a constant basis. But then you realize that maybe they weren't so great after all.

You are beginning to understand yourself and what you want and do not want. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging a bit more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and add things to your list of what is acceptable and what is not. You are insecure and then secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you or you lay in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough to get to know better. You love someone but maybe love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you are not a bad person.

One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap and getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision.

You worry about loans and money and the future and making a life for yourself and while wining the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out."

Source

(Unknown). Quarter-Life Crisis. Retrieved Online February 7, 2010 from http://www.cds.caltech.edu/~shane/text/quarterlifecrisis.html

For more reading on this topic, check out this article: http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://bernardoh.files.wordpress.com/2007/05/st-quarter-life-crisis.jpg&imgrefurl=http://bernardoh.wordpress.com/2007/05/02/a-singaporean-take-on-quarter-life-crisis/&usg=__arHlNVAPcT8MAtd0A19WfNUPCOk=&h=642&w=1200&sz=274&hl=en&start=10&sig2=W0eJbYtOThqouZhRo8c_Hw&um=1&itbs=1&tbnid=eQ5bDfZrc2OmCM:&tbnh=80&tbnw=150&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dquarter%2Blife%2Bcrisis%26hl%3Den%26rlz%3D1C1GGLS_enUS355US355%26sa%3DN%26um%3D1&ei=0nZvS_HxJcOXtgfG-9SMBg

Body Image Blues, Girls?

Television: Constant flooding of size 0 models and actresses.

Movies: Unrealistic expectations of clothing, relationships, and what 'normal' looks like. Only instead of a 17 inch flat screen TV, images are on the silver screen in all their glory.

Magazines: Page after page of styles, what's fashionable, "How to dress your Curves," and sex, sex, sex.

Family & Friends: probably the biggest competition around. We compare ourselves to our friends, what our mate might expect in our body, or how you "used" to look.

Don't like your nose? Not a Barbie Doll> When you look in the mirror, do you like what you see? Don't like your jean size? Well I can guarantee that 100% of females, and some males are fairly self-conscious about their body image. So what exactly is negative body image? WomensHealth defines,"A woman has a distorted perception of her shape and size, compares her body to others, and feels shame and anxiety about her body. Being unhappy with your body can affect how you think and feel about yourself as a person. A poor body image can lead to emotional distress, low self-esteem, unhealthy dieting habits, anxiety, depression, and eating disorders. Developing a positive body image and a healthy mental attitude is crucial to a woman's happiness and wellness."

So how do you get back to a positive body image? How can this change your lifestyle and internal dialog? The following 10 Steps to Positive Body Image by Wesleyan University are:

1. Appreciate all that your body can do. Every day your body carries you closer to your

dreams. Celebrate all of the amazing things your body does for you --running, dancing,

breathing, laughing, dreaming, etc.

2. Keep a top-10 list of things you like about yourself -- things that aren’t related to how much

you weigh or what you look like. Read your list often. Add to it as you become aware of

more things to like about you.

3. Remind yourself that “true beauty” is not simply skin-deep. When you feel good about

yourself and who you are, you carry yourself with a sense of confidence, self-acceptance,

and openness that makes you beautiful regardless of whether you physically look like a

supermodel. Beauty is a state of mind, not a state of your body.

4. Look at yourself as a whole person. When you see yourself in a mirror or in your mind,

choose not to focus on specific body parts. See yourself as you want others to see you -- as a

whole person.

5. Surround yourself with positive people. It is easier to feel good about yourself and your

body when you are around others who are supportive and who recognize the importance of

liking yourself just as you naturally are.

6. Shut down those voices in your head that tell you your body is not “right” or that you are a

“bad” person. You can overpower those negative thoughts with positive ones. The next

time you start to tear yourself down, build yourself back up with a few quick affirmations

that work for you.

7. Wear clothes that are comfortable and that make you feel good about your body. Work

with your body, not against it.

8. Become a critical viewer of social and media messages. Pay attention to images, slogans, or

attitudes that make you feel bad about yourself or your body. Protest these messages:

write a letter to the advertiser or talk back to the image or message.

9. Do something nice for yourself -- something that lets your body know you appreciate it.

Take a bubble bath, make time for a nap, find a peaceful place outside to relax.

10. Use the time and energy that you might have spent worrying about food, calories, and your

weight to do something to help others. Sometimes reaching out to other people can help

you feel better about yourself and can make a positive change in our world.

References:

Womens Health. (2009). Body Image: Loving Your Body Inside and Out. Retrieved online January 4, 2009 from http://www.womenshealth.gov/bodyImage/

Wesleyan University. (2002). Ten Steps Positive Body Image. Retrieved online January 4, 2009 from http://www.wesleyan.edu/weswell/docs/ed_bodyimage/10%20Steps%20to%20Positive%20Body%20Image.pdf

Movie Montage

We've all seen movies depicting a 'movie montage.' The films typically express the underdog training for a fight or race, drinking healthy drinks, working out, hitting a boxing pad, and of course excessive sweating. The montage is never complete without the music: cliche 80's hits like Eye of the Tiger, a husky male voice (such as Kenny Loggins), and a female background singer who's job is solely based on repeating the anthem. The whole concept of a movie montage is to convey that a time has passed, work has been done, and the hero is now ready for the 'big fight.' He's prepared, fit, appreciative of his trainer, and of course- still sweaty.

Some of the epic movie montages include:
8. 'Teen Wolf'- Win in the End
7. 'Naked Gun'- I'm Into Something Good
6. 'Dirty Dancing'- Hungry Eyes
5. 'Revenge of the Nerds'- One Foot in front of the Other
4. 'The Karate Kid'- You're The Best
3. 'Ghostbusters'
2. 'Scarface'- Push it to the Limit
1. 'Rocky IV'- The Training Montage

And of course the best movie montage, in my opinion, is Team America-World Police "Montage"; a self-conscious take on movie montage's concentrating on cliche build-up. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIi0vFyqWAc

So, you say, "Why movie montage's?" In person, I'd respond: "Why NOT movie montages?!" But since the blog needs a point consider the following:

1. If someone was to make a movie montage of the 'training' time in your life, what would the theme song be?
2. In your montage are you training for the big fight, just getting in shape, or feel like you're on your own (no trainer)?
3. Who would your trainer be (a friend, relative, co-worker, pet, God, a book, a concept)?
4. What did you train for specifically (career path, death of a friend/family member, school, sprititual battle)?

As cliche as movie montage's are, the whole concept is to convey that time has passed considerably in such a short section of film. If you're in the middle of yours, don't give up. There is always a hindsight perspective. If you've only just begun, get a great trainer and some kick butt music and truck on through.

Perfecting Ourselves To Death

Perfectionism is an avoided and yet prided word with connotations of straightening pencils and perfect clothes. Some perfectionists can be seen as simply hardworking and motivated; others let it affect their attitudes, health, and ultimately their relationships.

So, what type of perfectionist are you? I'm not talking about taking a self-quiz and getting a silly result that is so general and broad as a fortune cookie. Perfectionism can be split into several categories. Most of us with this trait can be dominant in one category while mixed slightly into others.

I recently attended a conference and heard the author, Richard Winter, speak about his book Perfecting Yourself to Death: The Pursuit of Excellence and the Perils of Perfectionism. Not only was his information a new and innovative in the area of the healthy vs. unhealthy perfectionist, but his English accent was swimmingly surprising. So, below I'll let you in on a few of his secrets (laid out in his book, but also in the notes of his lecture):

Types of Perfectionism:

• Appearance


• Performance/Academic


• Moral


• All round (all encompassing)


• Perfectionists think in ALL or NOTHING terms!

Unhealthy Perfectionists:

• Have standards that are high beyond reach or reason


• Strain compulsively and unremittingly toward impossible goals


• Feel their best efforts are never good enough


• Unable to feel satisfaction or joy in a job well done


• Measure their own worth entirely in terms of productiv ity and accomplishment


• Preoccupied with performance and/or appearance

Normal/Healthy Perfectionists (Person of Excellence):

• Pursue excellence


• Derive a very real sense of pleasure from the labors of a painstaking effort to meet high standards


• Feel free to be less precise as the situations permits


• Rejoice in their skills


• Appreciate a job well done

The 3 Dimensions of Perfectionists- Which One Are You?

• Self-Oriented: demand yourself to be better (high standards for yourself only); under stress you break down to unhealthy perfectionism and tend toward neutrotism. This type of dimension tends to be only related to your person only, no one else (your little bubble and your standards only).


• Socially Prescribed: perceived expectations of others very high; self-worth is contingent on others approval. Social situations depend on your thoughts of "Am I saying the right thing?" "Do I live up to their standards?"


• Others-Oriented: "Why can't everyone else do things the way I do things?" Very morally conscious; tends to set high standards for everyone else. Can be bossy, leadership qualities are high but when under stress can lead to unhealthy ranges.

Thought Patterns of Perfectionists:

• All or nothing


• Need for control


• Tyranny of "outs and "shoulds"


• Trying to live outside reality


• Perception of consistency failing to meet high standards set by self or others


• Shame, social comparison, inferiority


• Fear of making mistakes


• Fear of failure and rejection


• Discrepancy between perceieved and ideal self

Some Perils of Perfectionism:

• Anxiety & worry


• Indecisiveness and procrastination


• Decreased productivity and performance


• Impaired health (headaches, psychosomatic issues)


• Eating disorders


• Depression and suicidal ideas


• Relationship problems (Other-Oriented: critical and leaves broken hearts; Self-Oriented: afraid of opening up because of rejection)


• Obsessive comulsive Personality and OCD- desired sense of control.

OCD Vs. Perfectionism

• Perfectionism is one side of the spectrum dealing with control and anxiety- usually within a mindset that can be triggered and activated. Easy to change within most settings through therapy and therapuetic settings (talk therapy with friends or even relaxation).


• OCD is the other more extreme side of the spectrum dealing with higher control and anxiety- very similiar yet more ingrained in the brain dealing with personality and psychological issues. Hard to change without intense therapy, medication and cognitive behavioral help.

The Roots of Perfectionism

• Genes (can be found in family generations)


• Culture (Military, Asian cultures, Medical field, Media)


• Family (parental grace vs. shame, expectations, Freud/anal fixations)


• School


• Church


• Fear of failure, rejection or loss of control


• Pride


• Shame

Practical Strategies for Health: Learning to Live with Imperfection

• Evaluate Pros/cons


• recognize all or nothing patterns (keep a journal of thoughts/feelings)


• Move from idealism to reality


• Resist the Devil (arm yourself with truth)


• Accept day by day, little by littlework on small goals

Winter, Richard. (2009). Perfecting Ourselves To Death: The Pursuit of Excellence and The Perils of Perfectionism. As heard at the AACC World Conference 9/19/2009.